Complaints and the complaining complainers who make them

Sorry for the abrupt ending to the post [below.] I started writing it two mornings ago when I wanted to die, and didn't want to come in to work. I worked on it for the first two hours of my morning, and then ran out of time, so figured I'd come back to finish the bitchfest.

So I tried today. And my heart's just not in it. I just don't feel like bitching today! I had such grand plans for that post, and it would end with an exhaustive list of my symptoms and a plea for a diagnosis (other than psychosis.) But these things must come and go, because I can't recall what sucked so badly all last week and this weekend. I do remember becoming concerned about my perpetually bloody nose (not actually like a nosebleed, but lovely red strings of blood throughout all the snot when blowing my nose--this went on for more than a week before I decided to be concerned), my unpleasant and anything-but-regular bowel, and increasing sciatica causing me to stumble every now and again. So I worried about high blood pressure causing the apparent nasal equivalent of hemorrhoids, but I checked and I was fine (perhaps too low, in fact, at 95/70). I worried about my bowels, whether this would be the last straw to start the real hemorrhoid parade, but it hasn't happened! And I decided that the sciatica is fine. It's an annoyance, for sure, but compared to the neurological problems my sister dealt with in pregnancy, I can handle some tingling and weakness. It's like a gentle reminder to sit the hell down and take a break.

Speaking of, I think this is my biggest problem. I just don't like being a weakling. A sissy. A big sit-on-my-ass-so-I-don't-overexert-myself baby. But I talked to my mom about it, and it turns out that I'm just like her and my grandmother (poor Mike), and so if I don't want to turn out like them (requiring multiple knee replacements like my grandmother or having brittle bones and likely osteoporosis at 50 like my mother or peeing my pants several times a day like both of them), then I have to take it easy when my body says to, and I have to take all my calcium supplements even when it's hard to remember.

I think the peeing my pants thing is a lost cause. That's okay. Mike has cleaned up my pee more times than I'd like to admit already, and we've got a lot of golden years ahead of us. I love you, dear!!