(Click image to enlarge)It makes me crazy to look at. I mean, it's not that bad. It's what everyone does. When you have kids, they start school at some point, and you move at some points, and you change jobs at some points.
But it's intimidating to me. Particularly this year, because I am forced to change jobs, which forces us to change daycares. And since Anna will only be in half-day K, I will need half-day care for her, and full-day care for Emmy. And I don't know if I can find a place that will work for both kids. And I don't know that I can find a place. Period. I have to start visiting places, getting on waiting lists, and figuring out just what in the hell I'm doing. I don't know if I need care for 3 days/week, or 5 days/week, or, maybe, if I don't need care at all! What if I work evenings only once I leave Pitt? However, Emmy will just be turning 4. That would be the worst time to remove her from group care! It's finally time for preschool. So I'd feel awful to start keeping her at home full-time. Plus, I'm not sure I'd like it at all. In fact, I am almost guaranteed not to like it. But, I'll keep an open mind. Maybe it would be different being at home with an independent pre-schooler.
But I don't know what kind of job I'll get. I'd planned to find a pharmacy intern position. I'd like to. But, now, I am realizing that those positions may be quite hard to come by. I may need to wait for the perfect opportunity to fall into my lap. Most pharmacy programs hold graduation in May. But the students then have to take the Boards, and presumably they keep their intern positions until they pass Boards and are licensed. So I don't know when intern jobs tend to open up. Maybe in September! Maybe that's the perfect time. But, there is a chance that I won't find anything right away. I'll have my first school-placed practicum in November-December of this year, and if I don't have anything by then, I'm just hoping I can charm the socks off 'em, and get offered an intern position. Until then.... ?? Waitressing? I do miss it. Or maybe I'd be wiser to take a retail position in a pharmacy or grocery store, with the intention of sliding into the first pharmacy position that opens up. Our landlord's husband, when we met to sign the lease, blathered on about his great buddy who owns a small pharmacy, and how if I ever need a position or favor, to give him a call and he'd hook me up. I think the pharmacy was in a remote location, which would be hard, but also, is that all talk? Don't people always say crap like this, with no intention behind it? But, if I was desperate, would it be worth the phone call? The groveling? Many people believe that you have to know people to get anywhere in this world. That you have to have an in. And I hate to be that skeptical or pessimistic. But maybe it's true. And maybe it's not so awful. Maybe that's why people work hard and network and try to make friends... so that you have connections. You have those ins when you need them. I feel like I'm going to need some miracle, some in, at least, to find a school/daycare for the kids. And I know I'm going to need work to be able to pay for such a school. Everything has a way of working out, I know. And it will be okay. But my head is spinning.
Oh, and you see those stars on the timeline? The red stars, and the yellow stars? They are our best opportunity to squeeze in just one more little thing before we get too old, and miss the boat. They are 9 months apart.
But it's intimidating to me. Particularly this year, because I am forced to change jobs, which forces us to change daycares. And since Anna will only be in half-day K, I will need half-day care for her, and full-day care for Emmy. And I don't know if I can find a place that will work for both kids. And I don't know that I can find a place. Period. I have to start visiting places, getting on waiting lists, and figuring out just what in the hell I'm doing. I don't know if I need care for 3 days/week, or 5 days/week, or, maybe, if I don't need care at all! What if I work evenings only once I leave Pitt? However, Emmy will just be turning 4. That would be the worst time to remove her from group care! It's finally time for preschool. So I'd feel awful to start keeping her at home full-time. Plus, I'm not sure I'd like it at all. In fact, I am almost guaranteed not to like it. But, I'll keep an open mind. Maybe it would be different being at home with an independent pre-schooler.
But I don't know what kind of job I'll get. I'd planned to find a pharmacy intern position. I'd like to. But, now, I am realizing that those positions may be quite hard to come by. I may need to wait for the perfect opportunity to fall into my lap. Most pharmacy programs hold graduation in May. But the students then have to take the Boards, and presumably they keep their intern positions until they pass Boards and are licensed. So I don't know when intern jobs tend to open up. Maybe in September! Maybe that's the perfect time. But, there is a chance that I won't find anything right away. I'll have my first school-placed practicum in November-December of this year, and if I don't have anything by then, I'm just hoping I can charm the socks off 'em, and get offered an intern position. Until then.... ?? Waitressing? I do miss it. Or maybe I'd be wiser to take a retail position in a pharmacy or grocery store, with the intention of sliding into the first pharmacy position that opens up. Our landlord's husband, when we met to sign the lease, blathered on about his great buddy who owns a small pharmacy, and how if I ever need a position or favor, to give him a call and he'd hook me up. I think the pharmacy was in a remote location, which would be hard, but also, is that all talk? Don't people always say crap like this, with no intention behind it? But, if I was desperate, would it be worth the phone call? The groveling? Many people believe that you have to know people to get anywhere in this world. That you have to have an in. And I hate to be that skeptical or pessimistic. But maybe it's true. And maybe it's not so awful. Maybe that's why people work hard and network and try to make friends... so that you have connections. You have those ins when you need them. I feel like I'm going to need some miracle, some in, at least, to find a school/daycare for the kids. And I know I'm going to need work to be able to pay for such a school. Everything has a way of working out, I know. And it will be okay. But my head is spinning.
Oh, and you see those stars on the timeline? The red stars, and the yellow stars? They are our best opportunity to squeeze in just one more little thing before we get too old, and miss the boat. They are 9 months apart.
